Tuesday, February 28, 2012

The List

Matthew 5:44-45
Contemporary English Version (CEV)

44But I tell you to love your enemies and pray for anyone who mistreats you. 45Then you will be acting like your Father in heaven. He makes the sun rise on both good and bad people. And he sends rain for the ones who do right and for the ones who do wrong.

The reader may have noticed that my blog has been silent for a couple of months, I've lost track of exactly how long, actually.  This has not been for lack of inspiration or opinion.  (heavy on the opinion, I'm sure)  But for lack of time!  And I do believe that it has to do with the scripture above.

Forgiveness has long been a confusing thing to me.  Well, I did finally figure out what it is.  It is to not hold someone accountable for the wrong they have done.  But how does one do it? How does one feel it?  These questions have burdened me for some time.  There have been "things" that I have had a hard time moving past and letting go of.  And I've had a unsettling suspicion that this could mean there was not true forgiveness on my part. 

Through a couple of different people and some prayer, this portion of scripture was brought to my mind to the point of me finally being honest with God about it.  I can't pray for people/situations that I'd really rather not think about at all!  But if I am pushing something out of my mind and basically ignoring it, what is that?  Obviously, that it is not moving on, not letting go and certainly not allowing the healing power of God to take care of it. 

So, sparing the boring details, as I became honest with God about my feelings about praying for those who have mistreated me, the answers to my questions was right there in front of me.  Obedience.  Don't hold your "enemies" accountable for what they do.  (Don't worry, this doesn't mean they aren't accountable...just not to you)  And pray for those who have hurt you.  I realized that all this took was for me to obey it...sounds easy.  Not!  To phyically speak the names on The List took just about all the energy and intestinal fortitude I had! 

Since then I have not even had time to post on my blog.  Life has gotten very busy...with really good things.  I can't help but see that obedience to the Word of God is so important.  What will be released in your life when you obey?

2 comments:

  1. Amen, Susanna. Would that I could do the same... Holding on to these feelings assuredly only adds to the pain. Thanks for the insight - and sharing your revelation. dj

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    1. it's not always easy! But the reward is worth it.

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